Thursday, February 09, 2006

SO LONG....

I've just returned from the movie theatre. We watched Rang De Basanti. I must say, this movie has shaken me up. I'm still not able to recover from it. I haven't seen such intense emotions and actions anywhere before. It definitely makes you go in a retrospective mode. Its a must see.

I don't know whats wrong with me these days. But I definitely know that I need to do a few things that I've put off for a long time. Like getting over someone. I have this pathetic habit of still being in love with guys I've broken up with. I'm in love with both my exes. So now I have pratically stopped talking with one of them and he gets the same crappy treatment that some of my not so good friends put up with. Like hanging up the phone if I'm doing something, even trivial things like watching movies. I know its not nice but its due to this nice attitude of mine that I'm in trouble right now. I am not gonna try remaining friends with them. I have given up my claim on the one last thing I possessed that was given to me by one of them. In fact I've asked him to go ahead and give it to his current girl friend.I know one of them is going to be reading this and I can't help it if I'm such a disaster. I don't think I can have this 'unrequitted love' thing going on anymore. I'm gonna try to stop being this nice.

I was wondering why I haven't been posting here regularly. I've realised that its because I'm not comfortable posting here anymore. This was my personal blog where I could put up anything without having the fear of being judged. I started blogging coz I like to write. Given the time and the right mood I can come up with interesting write ups but now I have lost the right mindset to write something interesting. So I'm gonna stop blogging. This is my last post. So its good bye and thanks for everything :)

Monday, January 16, 2006

Time for change...

A new colour....a new nickname...does it make me look evil??? I don't care coz that seems to be my undertone these days...all the guys in my class think twice before playing pranks on me...they know better than to underestimate me...my innocent looks are my greatest assets...along with two others...my winning smile and my expressive eyes ;)...wicked or a simple prankster... depends on your point of view...I don't care...is that the right attitude???.....I just don't care anymore

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

A different perspective

I'm obsessed with my looks. No. I'm not incredibly beautiful nor do I give Sushmita Sen a run for her money in sensuality. I'm quite average, in fact there are somedays when I think I look really ugly. I think the obsession stems from the fact that I come from a family where all women are positively beautiful, extremely poised, graceful in every move and to top it off, they have an age defying beauty...my mum and her sisters look like they could be my sisters and my sister and cousins are definitely bombshells in the making. I, on the other hand come nowhere close to them....I could easily pass off as a distant relative. I try to make up for it by dressing well, trying to look somewhere close to well kept (atleast not ugly) and never let go off an occasion to dress up... atleast I manage to have a closet full of smart clothes that'd look good on someone slightly better than me. In the end I do pass off to be having an obsessive compulsive disorder to look good. There are days when a single compliment lights up my day and there are days when I grumble at my mum for not passing down her looks genes to me. All that I've achieved from my obsession is a name for having the best stuff around and the trust of my friends to dress them up... in fact everytime I've helped someone dress they've land up getting asked out (I'm well known for that too). There are times when I give up on myself coz this is what I am and no amount of chemicals is gonna change that.
But today I came across something that really pained my heart. I thanked god for my perfectly formed features and a fully functional body. This is what made me do it. Atleast I don't look repulsive.

P.S.: Nobody could guess what I was trying to tell in my earlier post so I'm gonna give a hint, 'what comes after X's' ...keep guessing :)

Saturday, January 07, 2006

The story of my life...

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And then she left her earthly existence...

Friday, December 30, 2005

quiz time!!!

Do you ever fall out of love? If yes, how??

Sunday, December 25, 2005

well..whatever

Firstly..bloggie dearie..I'm really sorry abt ignoring you this long and I wish I could put up a strong defence but the thing is I don't really have any defence...yeah so I had to study...I had these baap of all exams called 'endsems' doing bhangra on my head but I can't use that as an excuse to ignore you.
That done..now let me tell you what I've been upto...after the cursed exams which brought me on the verge of nervous breakdown (my friends think I have already passed the limits of nervous breakdown), I went home. After two days of sleeping I was off again on a ten day trip to 'Kerala' the only difference being I visited every other place except Kerala when I had specifically asked to arrange a trip to the God's own country. Anyway...had loads of fun...loads of shopping as usual...did a great job of putting up a happy face. Sometimes its just a pain in the ass to be this ever happy person when theres this whole lot of not-so-joyous emotions bursting to come out. But I know I can't afford to be emotional anymore....so I worked harder than I have ever done before...I think till date I've always had everything, including all my so called achievements handed on a platter to me but this time its a different story all together...the only time I can say I've put in so much effort and I don't even get a hint of results...anyway...for me, life moves on. I'm glad I have my dad supporting me or the world would've seen the end of me a long time back. Like he says, I'm just gonna work hard and satisfy myself with the thought that atleast I didn't give up. But the competitor in me doesn't agree with it...I want results...and fast...lets just hope I'm able to hush up that voice.
After a month of result nightmares, I've been able to take the blow quite well. But theres a limit to my strength...right now I walk around with a smile on my face...the day it gets too much to handle you just might find a pulp of what used to be me on the ground beneath the tallest building around here...Wish me luck for this sem :)
And lastly...I couldn't meet up with any of my friends...and not even call up anybody..and now my friends have been calling me up and using the choicest of words against me...great..it seems to be my turn to build up my foul language vocab :P...I hate doing this to them but then again...I really couldn't help it...my next break is gonna be dedicated to them completely..hope that makes up :)

Monday, November 21, 2005

Me a magnet????

Yep...I've turned into a magnet. I have the properties of attracting sleazeballs...the choicest of them. Some guys here tend to think that just coz I'm from Bombay I might have loose morals. So let me see, for the four months that I have stayed here, I have had the following guys hit on me,
  1. a class I romeo who thinks all girls are his play things and thinks that when I say a no I mean a yes
  2. a very indescent proposal from a sleazeball who mailed me from a fake id and expects me agree to sleep with him when I have no idea who the hell he is
  3. and this one takes the cake....mails me...asks me out....adds me on gtalk....keeps trying to talk to me when I have refused outright....and it turns out he is married....
And I have to spend two years here...god help me.....